Ad men

by theodotdoron

The advertising industry has enjoyed a bad rep, and still does. Too much cocaine, and everyone selling their soul to the industry. Words are sucked dry until no life is left in them and no brother deserves the truth. Car ads in particularly sell everything beyond the pile of trash in front of the customer. Feelings of freedom and independence, friends and fun, spaciousness in a crammed city. Oh, the irony, where do these ad-men think the chaos stems from? Prams and pedestrians? Beauty and innovation, all in a pile of scrap metal. Cars aimed at the middle classes, where the big money is at, do not embody any of these values. Neither are they much to look at. Any VW Polo owner would trade theirs in for a Lotus at the drop of a hat. Playfulness and regaining a lost youth is another one of the ad-men’s favourite take on a distinctly practical car, catering to the needs of your bog-standard suburban family.

Some ads tend to assume a potential customer to be the most gullible creature on the planet. A lab rat going back for pellets once they find out they have been laced with cocaine. Only, none of the ad-men would share their cocaine with a lab-rat. The cocaine most used on lab-humans is sex. No matter how dull the product, nothing a pair of tits won’t fix. The day a naked woman seductively graces a toilet in a provocative pose whilst using some very effective toilet cleaner will be witnessed by our generation. The female form is being adored more than ever before. In Berlin, every ad pillar in the centre is showing an oversized woman in nothing more than a bikini or even less in the summer months. Being a man must be quite task. Awkward moments ensue when one is out, waiting for a train to arrive, chatting away with a companion whilst trying to avoid looking at the buxom ten foot woman in the background.

It is so old, any creative person worth their salt shrieks at the mere thought of having to put sex into their work in order for it to gain a greater audience. It works, but is a no-brainer. Try it, add something nasty to your blog and see how your views double or even triple. After accidentally hash tagging one post not to long ago with an abbreviation from the porn-dictionary, views on my blog tripled. In only twenty minutes. Yep, tempting. No, not really. Some years ago a sect was going around called The children of God, and one of their techniques to add members to their group was via the famous slogan and practice Flirt to convert. Cocaine laced good news. Imagine. Imagine the Pope using raunchy background dancers to make his mass truly be for the masses.

Rihanna and Miley Cyrus are consequent in using their forms. After all, there is no business like show business. Beyonce has had so many nods to the SM scene in her Videos and the two younger girls are only taking it a step further. I seriously wonder if one day we will see live sex on stage as part of a music performance. No, I really mean that, I wonder how far one has to go to sell records. Lady Gaga’s crotch got her more dollars than her talent ever has. In every video she is furiously shaking and holding it into the camera as though no one had ever seen one before. Half of the population has one, the other half has most likely seen one. What is the appeal? Remember Tracy Emin, displaying her bed in an art gallery? Imagine a man shaking his crotch, picture Bob Dylan constantly shaking his. Can you see Picasso sharing in a gallery all the women he has slept with?

After being exposed to the female form on a daily basis, we have become accustomed to it so much, that we now have to put it in cuffs and bondage gear and latex just to add some eroticism. Like that middle class station wagon being labelled your ticket to freedom. It is marketing, pure and simple. Only, like the emperors new clothes, it will probably take a child to highlight the fact, that, really, all that is happening is that she is not wearing any clothes. Nothing new, revolutionary taking place. People have existed naked ever since the beginning of time. Parading women around all naked at all times is not particularly sexy. There is a reason women wear clothes: so that someone can take them off every now and them.And that’s when it gets truly sexy.

Advertisements