Language of luurve, baby!

by theodotdoron

According to some wise person called Mr Chapman, there are five love languages spoken amongst humans. Touch, gifts, acts of service, time and words of affirmation. Quite honestly, before having read that book I was firstly fairly often lost in this maze of human interaction. Secondly though I often saw my own love language, that of gifts, to be of inferior value. 

Morally inferior, more precisely. I thought it had to do with some serious issues. Something making it impossible for me to enjoy real intimacy and instead projecting it onto objects. Now, I have an authority to allow me to revel in my joy of gifts.I love giving gifts and getting them. However, the giving part is getting tricky, as not all people speak the same love language as me.

See, this is great, as it enables me to save myself a lot of frustration. I no longer give gifts and feel rejected by others if they do not receive them well. Their gift may be time spent together and so they see a gift as a cheap opt out. To me though, knowing how much it cost me to buy that gift and knowing it will land in the rubbish used to hurt me more than I like to admit.

Now I have taken to give money instead. Most people like money, lets admit it. Plus, I will give money as I see fit, and give time or touch or kind words to others who neither need nor want money. Well, great to know what language you are speaking and easy to find out what your spouse is speaking. Just go after what they complain about the most.

“We never spend enough time together” may be a hint. “You never bring me flowers” is another, and a dead give-away is the famous “you never help around the house”. Find out and have the quality of life increase immediately by several points. Do the dishes, he feels loved that way. Get that box of choccies, it says “Loveyhoneybunny” for your Loveyhoneybunny.

So, having a weak spot for an inanimate object is not something lousy per se. I am getting to view the ability of man to create something which necessarily will lack life as nevertheless a worthy pursuit. The only challenge is to not confuse the lifeless object to suddenly come to life just for me. I will only go away frustrated and disappointed. 

No, the ability of man to create is an indicator that man is divinely imprinted. Creating things are a wonderful thing and can bring much joy to life. I love the cupcakes I make. I love them. Yet calling them would be odd as I eat them immediately after. I have stuffed toys and they have names, only I tend to forget them. 

Only my Cheetah stuffed toy. It is called the same name my husband is called. He gave it to me during my hospital stay, as a representation of him whilst he can not be with me. It became a representation of who he is to me. And, similarly, we, as human beings are the representation of what created us. And, ideally, we get to represent this Creator to others around us. Lurve, Baby!