by theodotdoron

In London, back in the days, I loved my lager. It had to be a cold glass with condensation water slowly running down its side, no foam on the top, filled to the brim. There was never just one pint. It quickly lead to three, four more. Minimum. Later I would drink the occasional harder drink to please the crowd, as the evening went on. Every day was spent like this, except Sundays. Sundays I would generally cure my hang over. Watching stupendous telly and smoking one or two joints. 

Midweeks, during the day I would drink Orange juice. So people who only knew that side of me could have easily reached the conclusion that I am in fact a very health conscious girl. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Orange juice was my beverage of choice merely to stock up on liquid and vitamins during the day, since the previous and proceeding night always depleted me again.

Orange juice was my choice during my exchange year in the US. There I would easily drink a gallon a day. Yes, you read correctly. One entire gallon. Often times I would find myself rushing to the store at three at night to stock up on my then drug. Next to it I ate a huge bunch of grapes. Daily. Insane, I know. I did not loose crazy weight, and it also made me pretty unstable once I stopped these insane binges. Soon I would find myself attending Overeaters Anonymous meetings. 

After leaving the psychosomatic unity of a hospital due to some serious instability, I continued attending OA meetings, and was henceforth seen with diet drinks. Low Cal drinks. Soon though I found myself working at a Burger King and my weight quickly jumped through the roof. Not a smart choice of a career, I would say, considering my anamnesis.  Well, during those times you would see me with a high cal coke in my hand, or better still, those awful milkshakes. 

Having buried those habits in the grave, I started to opt for either milky tea, or milky coffee. During the day a bottle of apple drink would always be near where I was. It is a drink called Apfelschorle, and consists basically of apple juice diluted with sparkling water. It would cost 55 Cent for one and a half liters of drink. Considering my daily budget for everything was at 5 Euros, those cents were making it an incredibly luxurious drink. A tenth of my budget for something that is usually not considered staple food?

Well, after attending my dentists something emerged: terrible teeth, nursed over years of complete abuse. The nice doctor lady just nodded when I asked her whether my alcohol consumption with subsequent non-hygiene may have contribute to the rotting of my teeth. I now have a chronic disease usually found in people twice my age. Hm, crap. Had I only known. Well, to be honest, it would have not made the least bit of difference. Addictions don’t form due to lack of information. Just a little heads up to those who imagine they could be cured that way. 

Now I have bottles of water near me at all times. One is for travelling, with the exact size and perfect lid. VOSS, best bottle, and I have searched far and wide. Another bottle is in my bed, small size, perfect lid, perfect to refill. Another one stands around the house. Insecure lid yet perfect colour. The perfect bottles to accompany my life have become somewhat of a science to me. Now I am facing the challenge of finding something to carry warm water in since during winter months, nothing is more off putting than drinking cold water.

Please don’t hesitate to send me ideas including links, and if you are drinking lots of beer, try water. It may be that you are just really really thirsty. By the way, I only buy the VOSS bottle once, and then continuously refill it, but of course, dear VOSS representatives, if you want to sponsor me, feel free. I promise to carry a bottle of VOSS where ever I go.