Madonna, tic toc

by theodotdoron

The whole idea of conveying to someone who I am in four minutes would be akin to the scene in the following video in which Madonna is stamping over someones dinner table in laquered boots: Highly inappropriate. In reality, it usually takes even less time to be stuck in someone’s imagination as this, that or the other. First impressions and all that. Some may conclude from me posting this video that I have loose morals.

To forgive someone seventy seven times is a notion which strongly pushes against the idea of someone just being that someone. “They just can’t help it. A tiger can’t change it’s stripes. People don’t change. Yadi-yadi-yada”, goes the usual talk. And here in forgiveness we have an idea so outrageously standing up against such deeply held beliefs it startles.

People can change. the plasticity of the brain is a strong argument for this. Of course certain things are a kind of given, something even more startling. Your place of birth, for instance. Yet Subject to change is a sign on everyone’s forehead. As long as your heart beats tic-toc tic-toc, you too can change. It is our own experience telling us otherwise, witnessing against us.

We would like to express our feelings yet we can’t. We would like to be less angry, more caring, more ambitious, more concerned, more focused, less intimidating, more enticing, less abusive etc etc, yet we can not seem to be doing this. Why should we grant others this privilege we ourselves don’t seem to enjoy? Letting someone off the hook in essence says, “You can change, maybe one day you will be different”.

Constantly forgiving others may very well train you to keep the notion alive that change is possible. Further, you may be surprised at times. Further still, it breeds that notion that change, in fact, may be available to you, too. And, may I suggest, if change just won’t show that you consider the hint, the whiff of a Saviour? A Saviour saves us, yet in my case, most of the time from myself, even if that is not the full, but only partial truth.